Time will heal. Time will heal. Just stop crying. Stop those tears. A little voice at the back of my head, "LOL why the fuck are you crying?" I don't know, I really have no idea why. I'd like to know too, though. I am totally aware of what I should do, whatever I haven't done. Whatever we haven't done. Talk. But no. I told myself to not call. To just shut the fuck up.

It is whatever you think it is, hasn't it always been like this? Without any proof, just groundless accusations and assumptions. I accepted this painful fact.
In a relationship, honesty and trust must exist. If they don't, there's no point loving. If you can't afford to trust and to be honest, just stay single. Spare others and yourself the agony.
I was doing fine. Until I started to feel the same pain every single night now. Every single fucking thing reminds me of something. Every song that plays, every place I pass, every single damn thing, every single little thing.


In life, one of the hardest setbacks can be when someone you spend a lot of time with, someone you thought meant a lot to you, that when it comes to the point where you’re like “hey I’m here, I don’t feel so great” and that other person is just not there for you. You always thought that you’re something special to that someone, but then you realize maybe it was just wishful thinking that you’re special to them and you realize you’re not, then it really, really hurts.


My main priority now is to get my health back, to be happy and to find myself back. That is all. Cus it's time to leave those feelings behind.
I'm not gonna spend time chasing people. You want to leave? Fine. Go ahead. Because I'm done with chasing and caring for people who never had interest in me. Nothing lasts and people change. I've learnt love is hard and life isn't always what you want it to be.






Trying.
Crushed.
Hopeless.
Confused.
Messed up.
Disappointed.

"Are you okay?"
Yea, I am fine.
I will be.
I'm just tired.

I'm learning to keep everything within me. And once in awhile, I'll just cry everything out. Alone. I fall, I pick myself up. I'm just so exhausted, in so many ways.


3924 km apart, and it will minimize on Sunday. Which hopefully means I'll get a good wrap up for this sucky emotional entire past week, and hopefully a beautiful start of the next week. Other than that, I just wanna be alone.


I miss you.